Getting wounded
“So this is only for pregnant people? Not even for birth? Why is it so big? How many check-ups does one need?” Chiyo fired one question after the next. They had allowed her to come with them to Shin-chan's six month's ultrasound.
“There are pamphlets answering all those questions in the waiting room. Wait for us there.” Shin-chan told her, sighing slightly when she was out of earshot. “She has barely talked for six years. You show up and make her transform into a verbal waterfall.”
“Do you remember how you started to ask me about fun activities and shopping one day? It's just a phase, you went through it as well.”
“That doesn`t mean I have to like it.” They went up to the reception and gave their data. “I forgot how annoying it was to have a little sister.”
“You do know that kids are even worse than siblings? You are fully responsible for them and have to live with their tempers.” He grinned. “At least I would guess so, I had neither siblings nor kids yet. It's just what I get from observing.”
“Siblings are worse if you ask me.” The receptionist said who had listened to their bickering. “Parents tend to tell their kids to play with each other and always blame the oldest for wrongdoings. So it is easier to be a parent than an older sibling.”
“So the solution is to have more than one kid.” Shin-chan smiled maliciously at him. “Do your best.”
“You'll first have to birth this one before we can talk about more of them.” They went to the waiting room and sat next to Chiyo who read through everything she could find. “Found anything interesting?”
“You are not allowed to eat clams.” The girl informed her brother. “Or sushi.”
“And a lot of other things, I got a list. It's good that Kazu loves okonomiyaki best, so he has dragged me to safe restaurants even before we knew about the pregnancy.”
They continued to talk about pregnancy related topics until they were called. The doctor was surprised to see a young girl resembling Shin-chan, so they explained her presence immediately. While Kazu joked with the doctor how he had gotten Shin-chan to resort to laziness, that one lay down next to the ultrasound machine. Chiyo stared at his stomach as if something would happen if she looked away. Kazu took a seat next to Shin-chan's shoulder, enveloping his hand in his like the last time. The doctor started the machine and adjusted the device.
“Here she is.” He said after a bit. “Her head is on your right, the buttom on the left. Can you feel her movements?” On the picture she adjusted her legs.
“Not really.” Shin-chan admitted.
“Well, she is small and your muscles are not exactly lax.” The doctor typed a bit, measuring something.
“How big is she?” Chiyo asked.
“Patience, I am getting to that.” He clicked some more. “I can't exactly have her stretch, so I have to guess. She seems to be around twenty-five centimeters if I got that correctly.”
Chiyo hurried to grab a ruler from her bag and studied the length before asking: “How long will she get before she is born?”
“That depends on when she is born. Normally she should be fifty-two to fifty-six centimeters. I think she'll be able to reach around forty-five before we have to get her out.”
“Twenty centimeters to go, Kikyo.” Kazu said to the earily flat stomach.
“Until her seventh month she'll get longer, after that she'll gain weight and her organs mature. As long as she moves and your water doesn't break, she can stay in. Once she reaches forty centimeter, I'd like to see you every week for check-up, Midorima-san.”
“That sounds resonable. How long will she need to gain those twenty centimeters?” Though his voice held no intonation, his eyes were glued to the screen.
“Normally around eight to ten weeks. As soon as she is that big, I will give you a medication that makes her lungs mature sooner. It will give her a better chance to stay healthy when she is taken out before she is due.” He clicked some more, printing out a photo for them. “Please do your best to relax as much as possible in that time. If she can stay just a few days more, it will have a tremendous effect.”
“So it might be only two more months?” Chiyo stared at the small creature who looked like someone had stuck two balls together and glued four sticks to it.
“Believe it or not, right this week she passed the date where she might be able to survive outside. If she were to be born now, her survival rate would be about thirty percent. In two weeks, it is sixty percent.”
“It's hard to believe.” She inclined her head. “Do you have a picture how she would look if she were to be born now?”
“Of course.” He shut down the machine and took out a book from his shelf. “The kids in this chapter are as old as that.”
She began flipping the pages, Kazu taking a look over her shoulder while Shin-chan stayed back. He cleaned his stomach and took the picture from the doctor, exchanging a few questions and answers.
The babies looked beautiful, even if they were a bit out of shape. All of them seemed peaceful, some peachy, some with nearly translucent skin. Chiyo asked: “Shin-chan, don't you want a look?”
“I know the book.” He answered. “All those babies are dead. I find that a bit depressing.”
Well ... no wonder they looked peaceful and had smooth skin. Most likely living ones would be uglier but at least they would move. Chiyo closed the book with a thud and gave it back. They thanked the doctor and left. Shin-chan got an appointment at the desk in a month while Kazu stayed silent, sending Chiyo concerned gazes. She seemed dreamy, somewhere far away but it did not look like it was a good place. Her glazed over eyes seemed teary.
“You still give your heart easily.” Shin-chan told her once they had stepped out.
“I was happy they were alive”, she whispered.
“I am sorry. Those etheral beauties were not real. Real prematurely born babies are fighting for survival and looking like that too.” He explained. “I looked it all up as soon as I got home the last time.”
“I'd have a permanent headache if I was thinking that much. Can't you be happy Kikyo is well and has a lot more time to grow?” Kazu had so shake his head. Really, those two could be difficult.
“But what if something happened today and she had to be born early? I'd have a panic attack if I did not know her survival chances and what her health problems would be. I can't just be happy and then fall into shock if I had complications.”
“I don't think I would be able to leave home. What if something happened on the road? It's hard to step outside even if you are not pregnant. To know what could happen to your child if you went out...” Chiyo bit her lower lip.
“Bad things do happen. You can't stop living simply because you are afraid. Yes, something sad might happen if you go out. But it could also be something happy. It is something happy much more often than not.” Kazu took one hand each. “You are both so afraid and want to control everything to feel a bit safer. But you will never be able to control everything. You can either despair or you can accept that fact. Stop trying so hard. It is okay to be human.”
“I could never forgive myself if something were to happen to our daughter.” Shin-chan's voice seemed strained, his eyes full of fear. Chiyo looked at her brother with much the same gaze.
“But it might.” Kazu took a deep breath. “She might not live, she might be disabled. She might be completely healthy but have an accident one day. You cannot save her from everything. What is important for me is that I don't loose you as well. And I fear that I will if you keep taking responsibility and blame to that extent.”
“But ... I ... I can't.” Shin-chan seemed close to panic. “I can't, Kazu, that's just ... I'm afraid.”
“I know. I am not asking you to do it here and now. Work toward it.” He smiled, stepped nearer and shushed the other a bit. “Now relax, please. I did not want to upset you like that.”
“What if she climbed a tree and fell? What if she throws a hairdryer in her bath? What if she tipped a cup of boiling hot water?” Chiyo looked at Kazu aghast. “So many things could happen if you aren't careful enough.”
“There is a fine line between not caring enough and being overprotective. You both would be overprotective. It is important to care but you'l dig your own grave if you overdo it. Children won't become independent if you don't let them experience danger.”
“They'll become as afraid of the world as we are, huh?” Chiyo leaned into her brother. “We grew up far from people and danger.”
“You grew up sheltered away. I had it hard as a child but that makes navigating in this world easier now.” Kazu took Shin-chan's other hand and had them move to the next train station. “If I were to be homeless tomorrow, I'd know how to get a roof, a job and food by then. It is sad how I came to know that but it serves me well. I'd like our daughter to learn that as well, just without the pain. There are less radical ways than having nothing but a key and a weekly stipend from the age of eight.”
“Let's concentrate on bringing her into this world first.” Shin-chan decided. “We can quarrel about how to bring her up afterwards.”
“Good idea.” Kazu said smiling.
It was in the middle of mathematics when Shin-chan spaced out before frantically grabbing Kazu's hand and pulling it to him. With a careful look to their teacher who was writing something on the board, Kazu moved his stool and came nearer. He wanted to ask what this was about but stayed silent when Shin-chan tucked out his shirt and laid Kazu's hand on his bare skin.
Beneath it he could feel a faint movement, not exactly a kick but something like a very tiny foot rebelling against his muscle cage by pressing outward. He looked up to see Shin-chan not only smiling but grinning. He answered with the same expression. Kikyo lived and she was well and moved just like she should. Right this moment all was well.
“Takao, Midorima, what are you doing over there?” The teacher, Ikeyama-sensei, asked them.
“Sorry, Sir.” Kazu reluctantly let go of his boyfriend and righted his stool.
“Answer the question.” Ikeyama, a man of about fifty years, went to where they said. “It looked quite indecent from where I stood.”
“Not at all, Sir.” Kazu smiled winningly. “Our daughter just kicked for the first time, so we were a bit preoccupied.”
“Your ... what nonsense is this?” The man seemed to grow angry.
“I am pregnant.” Shin-chan decided to cut in. “Weren't you informed about that?”
“Are you joking with me? You are much too young to have a child.” Ikeyama looked aghast. “Kids like you should have the responsibility and decency not to let it come to that. Didn't your parents teach you better?”
Kazu blinked in surprise before he felt the hurt. Well, there was a damn lot he could say to that. Most of all that this man had no clue at all about their situation and should not judge like that. Before he could formulate an answer though, Shin-chan seemed to have decided to solve a social situation himself: “I would kindly ask you to direct those questions to the director or our coach. Lessons should not be wasted for such discussions.”
Well, yay for people who could keep their emotions in check. He would have to kiss his boyfriend later for that answer. It was a good reminder and would have most people back off.
Not Ikedaya though.
“What insolence! Don't you have any shame? Openly advertising such a disgrace and showing no regret at all. You should lower your head and ask society for forgiveness for impending on them with such a despicable example.” The standing man lectured.
“I won't apologize for loving and protecting a child. I won't raise our daughter in shame. I cannot accept your opinion.” Shin-chan stayed as objective as possible but Kazu could hear his anger.
“Don't you have any humility? I cannot believe you were not suspended yet. The director will hear about this!”
“He knows.” Kazu intervened. “Like we said before, other people have already talked this through with us. Please talk it out with them.” He saw how Shin-chan's hand was shaking in silent anger, his own not much better off. Gods, he wanted to tell this man to shut his mouth.
“Do you have to hide behind people too good-natured to tell their mind? Do you need other people to apologize for you? Do you think everything may be bettered by having your parents lower themselves for your wrongdoings?”
“I have no problem to stand up to you myself and protect the people I love from your callousness.” Which Kazu promptly did, standing up to the same height as their teacher. “If you have no intention to solve this without impending on all others here, I am not one to stand down. Teacher or not, you have no right to dishonour my lover or daughter.”
“Are you openly stating your sickness and not even ashamed? What has this world come to if boys think they do not have to abide by society's rules any longer? If you had a shred of honour and love for that child, you would give her up for adoption, so that she won't have to live with the stigma of having under-age, male, unmarried parents. What do you think her life will be like with that story? Other mothers will forbid their children from playing with her, rightly so because if she inherits your rebellious nature, nothing good can come from a child like that.”
Kazu wanted to answer but his throat would not let out sound, his lips would not open. His body failed him while his mind screamed at him to do something. Was this how he intended to protect Shin-chan? To stay silent when his boyfriend needed him most?
“You are right.” Said boyfriend answered, standing closely behind Kazu. “As long as there are narrow-minded people like you in this world, people like us and our children will suffer. We made our choices but our children did not. They do not deserve your hatred or prejudice, they are innocents. But you shun them on principle. I pity all children who already had to suffer through your self-righteous morale.” Shin-chan spoke over his head, having twenty centimeters on Kazu and their teacher. “I refuse to be treated like this because of your hateful view on the world.” He lay a hand on Kazu's right upper arm. “Let us go, Kazu. I am sure this lesson is cancelled for today.”
“What! What insolence!” Ikedaya stuttered. “Stay right here! I am not finished with you two.”
“We may solve this with the director present but not like this. You refuse to listen anyway.” Shin-chan seemed completely calm and collected, taking his own bag and shortly packing Kazu's. “This way the class might get the lesson they deserve at least.”
“I will have you suspended from school for this!” The man tried to intimidate them.
“Other schools will take us with open arms. We are both top students, Shin-chan is the number two elite student in the whole country and Todai-hopeful. We are also basketball geniuses on the national level. You might want to think your threads through.” Suddenly it all seemed very easy. Shin-chan intervention had broken him from his stupor. He took his bag and his boyfriend's hand. “We expect an apology for this.”
They left. They also tried to ignore the cursewords their teacher yelled at them. The last part was hard because some of them were nasty, unimaginable from the lips of a teacher. They exchanged a look of fear, finally running out of bravado. Even against all his intentions, tears started to spill from Kazu's eyes. His boyfriend wrapped his arms around him, holding onto him like onto an life-line.
Shit. They might just have destroyed their high-school career. Kazu could only hope that someone might jump over his shadow and either stop the suspension or take them into a new school instead.
The door of their classroom opened which made at least Kazu flinch. But instead of their teacher, the class president stepped out, followed by a pretty, normally giggly girl in their class. Kazu and Shin-chan parted while the first wiped his eyes.
“I am not sure which side is right but Ikedaya went too far.” The class president said, the girl beside him nodding. Before he finished the sentence, other classmates followed. They could hear their teacher completely losing it in the classroom.
“Thank you, everyone.” Kazu whispered, unable to believe what he saw. “Should we go ask the director for help?”
“That is a wise decision.” Their class president answered. “Mi-chi, would you run and get the student council president from his class?”
“Of course, Ida-kun.” The girl who had stepped out with him answered. “Let's meet in front of the director's office.”
“By the way, you guys could have said something about the pregnancy, you know? Or am I the only one who did not know?” Ida looked over his shoulder but most others shook their heads. “I mean, you are open with your relationship but that ...” He looked at Shin-chan's stomach insecurely.
“We were sure this would go around in school like wildfire.” Kazu scratched his head. “Sorry, we just assumed you heard. Shin-chan is in his sixth month after all.”
Some girls gasped, others began whispering. Most simply looked at them in stupor.
“Get back into this classroom this instant!” Ikedaya screamed at them from the door.
“No, sir, we'll go bring this before the director.” Ida answered calmly. “Let's go.”
“You don't look pregnant at all.” A girl said while they walked, staring at Shin-chan's stomach in adoration. “How can you be so lean in sixth month?”
“I am an athlete. I have well-toned muscles.” Shin-chan answered them, a bit out of sorts with their sudden interest. “I am also a lot taller than most women.”
“How does it feel?” Another asked. “You said she kicked, right?”
“She's still doing that.” Something like a smile took over his lips. “It's like a baby kitten that wants milk or cuddles. It's hard to feel at all.”
Some girls cooed and ahhed at that. Kazu had to think of their last ultrasound. Kikyo did not look much different from a newborn kitten so the image wasn't too strange.
“Can we feel it?” One of them asked.
Kazu made a quick calculation from the green twitching eyebrow and answered: “Shin-chan is not exactly touchy-feely, you know? That is too forward.”
“Oh, sorry, I forgot myself.” The girl blushed. “I was just so excited. A real baby! That's our first class baby. Miyako from Class C already had one and some of our third-years also have kids.”
Miyako? Shit, he had slept with her. Had their condom broke? No, that couldn't be. She would have told him if she had a child by him, right? Well, now was not the moment to think about that. He would inquire later.
“I also want to marry and have children.” The girl's eyes turned dreamy. “Babies are so cute.”
“You may see Kikyo when she is born.” Kazu told her. “Though I can't promise that my possessive boyfriend won't try to hide her.”
They continued to talk about boys versus girls, little cousins and lastly that Miyako had married the father of her child which made Kazu able to relax. So it wasn't his. Hopefully. The timing was still uncomfortably close. She must have slept with that new boyfriend two or three weeks afterwards if she had it nine months later. At least that boyfriend wasn't from this school. If he hadn't showed up to punch Kazu yet, he was most likely in the clear.
They reached the director's office, having met Mi-chi and the student council's president on the way. Ikedaya had followed them, silently fuming. They knocked on the director's door and Ida – taking the lead – ushered in Shin-chan, Kazu, Mi-chi, the president, Ikedaya and himself, telling the others to wait.
“Well, good morning to all of you.” The director greeted which they all responded to. “I am a bit surprised about this gathering. Have I missed some appointment? Mito-kun, what is the matter?”
Their student council president answered that he was just as confused but seemed to have grasped the situation enough to give the word to Ida. He also explained that Ida was a valuable junior member of the student council just like Mi-chi and that they were class president and vize. Ida explained the incident in detail, not allowing Ikedaya to get a word in. He made sure to mention that Kazu and Shin-chan had asked their teacher to stop and discuss the matter with the director three times, never raising their voices.
The director nodded, turning to their teacher and asked him: “Is that account correct in your opinion, Ikedaya-san?”
“Not at all, Himeya-sensei. Those two have defied me multiple teams, neither asking for forgiveness for their rudeness nor explaining themselves like I asked them too. They have undermined me in front of the whole class, inciting them to collectively walk out in defiance to the rules.”
“Midorima-kun?” Their director had no intonation, much like the one he was talking to now.
“Ikedaya-sensei told us we should be ashamed for our daughter and give her up for adoption if we valued her at all. Kazunari repeatedly asked him to stop and discuss it elsewhere. When Ikedaya-sensei turned to insults, we left. I do not want to repeat what he called us.”
“Don't you see that this is for your best? Students should focus on studying, not spending their time indecently, especially not with having kids. Every kid will need a stable family or it will turn out like this boy.” Ikedaya pointed at Kazu. “Don't you see that not having responsible parents will only end in failed existences like that boy who carelessly brought you into this situation?”
Kazu's voice failed him for the third time today. Gods, he wanted to scream. He wanted to cry and hide. Anything but this. Please, why couldn't he be stronger?
“This is it.” Midorima's face changed at once, turning ferocious. In an instant the room was filled with the terrifying scent of an Alpha who would fight for his mate.
“Don't!” That gave Kazu the push he needed, jumping in front of Shin-chan. “Babe, you're pregnant, this isn't good for your body. Please calm down. I am angry as well but this is dangerous for Kikyo. Please calm yourself.”
His boyfriend took a deep breath but the scent only weakened slightly. At least his body did not look like a wild cat ready to pounce. His eyes stayed on Ikedaya though, daring the man to say another word.
“Thank you, Takao. As always your quick thinking is invaluable.” The director nodded to him. “You are all allowed to return to your lessons. Ida-kun, please have everyone do homework until the next hour. I will talk it through with Ikedaya-sensei. My deepest apologies, Midorima-kun, this happened due to my negligence of not informing the whole staff.”
Kazu saw the director bow his head in front of his boyfriend, unable to really comprehend that. What was happening here? No director ever bowed before a student. Midorima bowed just as deeply, thanking the other and turning to leave. All others followed him, mostly even more confused that Kazu. Their class greeted them back, looking from one to another for an explanation.
“What just happened in there?” Their student council president finally asked.
“My parents and the director discussed the situation extensively, securing his support. Ikedaya stepped out of line and will be punished accordingly.” Shin-chan nodded to Ida. “Lets go back to the class. We are to do homework for the rest of this lesson.”
He then walked forward as if nothing out of the ordinary had just happened. Kazu followed him, widening his eyes when he saw the dark smirk on his boyfriend's lips. He had known this would happen. This was why he had been so calm. What a deal had his parents made with their director?
Shin-chan seemed to have noticed his questioning gaze and answered lowly: “I had Akashi talk with our director once. They paid a lot of money to get me to attend this school. They would be mad to suspend me after paying that much.”
Oh gods, even Shin-chan had a dark side. He enjoyed the thought of what would happen to Ikedaya. But somehow Kazu couldn't really blame him. It might not be good and nice but revenge was indeed sweet.
Ikedaya ignored them afterwards. They did not raise their hands, he did not ask them to read out answers or do exercises on the board. While they did not get their apology, this was better than nothing.
They continued training, Kazu hilarious about seeing the others under Shin-chan's regime and that one fully enjoying giving instructions. Their coach simply watched them and let his assistant handle them. After two more weeks, Shin-chan started showing, even if it was only millimeters. Kazu did his best to massage him every night, trying to loosen the taught muscles.
It took seven weeks until Kikyo got to the point where they needed to attend appointments weekly. Kazu played at his best, rushing through the ranks in the InterHigh preliminaries. His boyfriend sat out the games, cheering from the ranks – mostly coordinating their cheers, so that their morale support was stronger than ever.
Kazu was sure to win until they had to face Seirin again. Shin-chan had drilled them, giving their fast forward about a thousand pointers how to counter Kagami. He was still nervous when they went up against them. Right until warm up at least when he went over to Kagami to ask: “Has Kuroko learnt an unbelievable trick or is it normal that I can't see him?”
“Morning, Takao.” Kagami scratched his head, his grin off a bit. “Well, he is sitting next to your boyfriend.”
He looked up, indead seeing Kuroko right next to the mass of orange shirts. It seemed like Shin-chan and him were deep in discussion.
“The plan is to destroy your moral support by getting Midorima completely wrapped up in talk about nappies, room colour schemes and whatnot.” That seemed to be Kagami's try at being sarcastic. He looked down, a bit embarrassed.
“Wait a minute. Is he pregnant as well?” Kazu asked in surprise.
“Damn smart people.” The redhead sighed. “It was kind of an accident, you know? Those heat circles are really something.” The last was more of a grumble. “And even though he doesn't have to, he decided to sit this out as well. He even said it is okay if we lose. Sometimes I don't get him.”
Kagami really was dumb sometimes. Even if it was no great risk, Kuroko would not take the slightest of risks. That one look was enough to see the boy with the biggest of smiles Kazu had ever seen him with. He was not in the slightest bit unhappy about being pregnant, for once by a man he wanted to have kids with. He had always wanted them, this time allowing himself to. He was healing in his own way.
“Well, just stay how you are, that is how he loves you. Even if you do not understand him.” Kazu grinned.
“You know what he thinks, huh? I hate to always be the last to know when it comes to my mate.” The other pouted, not really looking angry or sour. “At least Aomine is even thicker than me, that makes me feel a bit better.”
“You're still friends?” Kazu asked cautiously.
“Sure, playing him is fun. And what can I say when my mate forbids me from being angry on his account? Life goes on, I guess. We all make mistakes, some worse than others. Sometimes it is best not to think too much.”
Huh. He had always thought Kuroko loved his mate despite being dumb but it seemed being an easy-going guy came along with that. That was a strength in it's own way. Shin-chan might be a genius but that came with so many downs … Kuroko seemed to like it easy. That might not be a bad choice when all you wanted was a family without too many complications. Shin-chan and family spelled trouble in itself. That was most likely the reason Kuroko had passed on him even though he was very reliable. That explained why he refused Shin-chan back then. His boyfriend might not have noticed but Kazu knew that he had silently offered marriage to Kuroko in middle school. He had always been thankful that the Aomine trauma did not make Kuroko run to the one offering comfort and safety. If he had, Kazu would not have a boyfriend today. Now he could conclude that Shin-chan had never even remotely been Kuroko's type.
“You still here?” Kagami asked with a hand on his shoulder.
“Sorry, just thinking.”
“I noticed. That makes me feel down after I just told you I tend not to do that.” He lowered his hand. “At least we can play a bit of basketball.”
“A bit … it's the preliminaries' pre-final, Bakagami. And we plan on winning – no Kiyoshi, no Kuroko, this might actually work.” Kazu grinned. “If not, we'll face you with full strength in winter. You'll still be without Kuroko then, right?”
“And without Kiyoshi.” The redhead let out a big sigh. “This season is cursed.”
“Let's make the best of it!” They shook hands before beginning their warm-ups.
